"When upon lifes billows you are tempest tossed....

....when you are discouraged thinking all is lost
count your many blessings name them one by one
and it will suprise you what the Lord has done."

The outcome has sunk in and life is moving on. I have been able to realize the blessings in this whole mess.

I am grateful that we had savings to use first to minimize the debt.
I am grateful for my husbands talents. He was able to do almost all the work himself which saved us a TON of money.
I am grateful for my Dad, brothers, neighbors and friends who helped to work on the house.
For Eric's diligence to make sure that all the damage was gone.
For my mother in-law for making us lunch.
For my mom and sisters for watching the kids so we could work.
For our patient and kind lawyer!
For my parents letting us live with them until we could move in.
And for the TPing partys enthusiasm! :)

We have been blessed.

What Could Have Been....

It is done. Finished. The end. After owning our beloved house for over a little over a year, our legal battle has come to an end. Unfortunately it was an end I didn't think was possible. We were not victorious in our fight and I feel broken because of that. For this past year I feel that I was able to endure, look on the bright side, get by living in most of my house, sacrifice time as a family, watch my money disappear and debt grow all because I believed, I mean really believed, that things would be made right. I believed that all of the awful things this house hid would be made right, our nightmare summer would be worth it and all the unbelievable things we went through would be over. Alas, that is not how it played out and so we need to pick up the pieces and move forward. This is a lot harder than I thought, mostly because I didn't think this is how it would end. I thought right would win and wrong would lose. I believed that honesty would be rewarded and dishonesty punished. I have to let go of what could have been with this house and that is hard. Who knows when I will have a master bedroom and even longer until I have a master bathroom, if I ever have a master bathroom, when my kids will have their playroom, when I will have blinds not made of paper, when I can look at my house and not just wish it would burn down. I know I need to get back to looking on the bright side, counting my blessings and being grateful for what I have, and I will get there, but for now I am heartbroken.

Happy Birthday Natalie!

I can't believe that she is 7! It is amazing to me how fast the time has gone. I wish I could have gotten pictures of her when she was younger but that was before my digital days and the scanner isn't cooperating. I remember being so excited and SO ready for her to get here 7 years ago. My due date came and went with contractions happening like crazy. Finally a week later my doctor let me go to the hospital only to be sent home later that night with an Ambien so I could sleep. Shortly after getting home the contractions kicked into high gear so there was no sleeping. With not wanting the emotional roller coaster of getting sent home again, it took Eric until after 5 in the morning to convince me we needed to go back. Natalie was born VERY quickly after making it back to the hospital. She was the most beautiful, perfect thing I had ever seen.

Natalie has been full of life and personality since the day she was born. She loves her family, drawing, coloring, anything art related, swimming, dance, gymnastics and singing. Natalie has always been very social and can win anyone over with her charm and smile.

We love you Natalie and are so happy you are part of our family! Happy Birthday!

My Besties

My besties. One of them started using this term and I rather like it. These two are my best friends. One since as long as I can ever remember and one since she moved to Oregon in Junior High. We have gone through a lot together, had our ups and downs, cried, laughed, fought and everything in between. Though it all we have stayed the best of friends and without them my life would not be the same. About every other year we have managed to have a girls trip. With one of us always seeming to be pregnant or have a little baby we have yet to go on some fabulous trip (but we are planning it!) but we do have the best time. This time the destination was Utah for a week of kidless (except beautiful baby Marley) fun! We had some great plans but staying up until 4 am talking sort of got in the way. We talked, ate like we were 16, acted like we were 16 or maybe 13(sitting on a display couch in Target and laughing so hard we were crying as people walked by and stared like we were crazy), cried, laughed, shopped, went canoeing, walked around the beautiful lake in Chiara's neighborhood (which FYI is now closed after dark, but then again we were always a bit rebellious) and had an absolutely memorable time. We also got to celebrate Chiara turning 30 with her husband and mom putting together a surprise party! Tiffany and I in the canoe.

We wanted to kayak but apparently there is another new rule that guests need to be in the same boat as residents. I wonder if we had showered, put make-up on and had not been in our pjs if maybe we could have worked the system. ;)

Chiara and I

The Besties

We hardly took any pictures the whole time so in a last minute attempt Tiff's camera on auto caught this beauty. Looks like Chiara is trying to strangle her.

Fountain Fun

The kids had a blast playing at some fountains for one of our ward's park outings. And in case you were beginning to think Cameron is my favorite child, since many of the pictures are of him, that is not the case. I just have to constantly be following him around so most of the shots are of him. Then there is Ella who 90% of the time screams if you try and take her picture. No this is not a picture of Eric as a child. We can just call this kid Eric Jr.

Day 1

Yesterday it was getting close to Cameron's nap time and I couldn't find a single binkie. AnYwHeRe! We have like 5 of them so really you would think I could find at least one, but no. I was talking with my friend and she suggested I just be done with them since I had been planning the detox. First I didn't do it because we were driving to Utah and I didn't want to think about all the screaming for 12 hours in the car with no binks. Recently it has been the fact that in a few days I am leaving for a girls trip to Utah and my kids will be cared for during the day by other members of my family. I could just see them cursing my name as they try and get him down for a nap with no binkie. Well I couldn't find one in time for nap so I just decided to bite the bullet. NO MORE BINKIES! Both yesterday and today for naps he cried for a good 20-30 minutes before falling asleep in front of the door. Last night for he screamed and cried and every once in a while would say "Where are they? I can't find a binkie!" It was sad and broke my heart but there is no turning back. His sweet little voice is all raspy today. 4 more nights before I leave. I hope he is adjusted by then. Otherwise sorry Joanna, Rachel and Deidre. :)

The Coast

We recently took our first trip of the summer to the coast. You can't really say beach because the word beach brings thoughts of warm, blue water, clear skies, swimsuits, etc and that isn't usually the way things are at beaches in Oregon. Don't get me wrong I love the coast and think it is beautiful, but usually some sort of jacket is required, many times it is cloudy and windy and the water is fun as long as you don't mind getting numb first. We had a great time playing in the sand, being chased by waves, hunting for shells, eating lunch (I think Cam ate more sand than food) and hanging out with my sisters for a little while. We are looking forward to our next trip.

This is such a sweet picture of Eric and Cameron but what you can't tell is that Eric has the death grip on Cameron because he had no fear of the water. I mean really I have tons of fears so why can't my kids have some!

Ella is so funny with pictures, sometimes she screams bloody murder if you try to take one and other times she wants a photo shoot. She found this really long stick and wanted me to take pictures for several minutes.

Cam digging in with his oh so attractive Dorito face.